TSA寫作技巧系列:又係要elaborate

這兩位同學的分別就是一個無elaboration,另一個無:

其實第二篇的作者沒有什麼驚人的論點, 只是他/她會將信上的每一點都「發大」來講. 題目話吸煙harm the health,佢就舉cancer做例子. 題目說佢在losing weight,佢就話咁會唔靚. 跟住再講佢會無朋友和無得打排球, 都用兩三句去「加鹽加醋」.咁樣已經可以攞高分了.

TSA writing marking scheme

http://www.bca.hkeaa.edu.hk/web/Common/res/2009secMarking/S3/9EW123.pdf

TSA寫作技巧系列:又係要elaborate

這條是2007年第1條題目.以下是問題:

這兩位同學的分別就是一個無elaboration,另一個無:

其實第二篇的作者沒有什麼驚人的論點, 只是他/她會將信上的每一點都「發大」來講. 題目話吸煙harm the health,佢就舉cancer做例子. 題目說佢在losing weight,佢就話咁會唔靚. 跟住再講佢會無朋友和無得打排球, 都用兩三句去「加鹽加醋」.咁樣已經可以攞高分了.

TSA寫作技巧系列: 用mindmap去organise文章

以下是2008年TSA WRITING第二條題目:

"Your teacher has asked you to write an article for the school newspaper telling new students about the clubs/activities at your school."

題目俾了一個mind map, 提示學生要寫什麼,包括不同的club的名, 佢地的information, 和參加的理由.

普通的學生都如此分段: 首先: 寫不同club的名, 跟著介紹它們的information,最後鼓勵同學參加. 例如以下的sample. 這個學生不單有三段, 還有頭尾的introduction和conclusion:

How much do you know about our school clubs and activities? Have you joined any of them? I am going to tell you more about our school clubs and activities.

Our school has many clubs and activities such as Drama Club, Music Club, Computer Club and Girl Guide. Most of our students can join them. However, there is a limit number of students for each club.

These clubs and activities usually take place in classrooms after school. Some of them may be held on Saturday. They will have a meeting once a week. Different clubs and activities have different teachers-in-charge.

You may ask why we have to join school clubs and activities. In fact, there are many advantages after joining these clubs. You may make more friends with the students from other classes as all the students can join them.  You might also learn a lot of new things. Different clubs can teach you some particular knowledge and skills;  for example, you may learn some music theory in the music club or you may learn some first-aid skill in the Girl Guide. Moreover, these clubs may organise a camp and you may learn some knowledge that cannot be learnt in the lessons. It is a very special chance.

After reading this article, you may consider deeply and join school clubs and activities. There are only benefits for you.

弱的學生會唔識用mind map去organise. 會咁樣寫:

TSA寫作技巧系列: 唔好剩係寫prompts, 要elaborate

最近都在研究TSA.TSA中三的英文作文其實係一個幾好的練習.

2008年那年有條題目是這樣的：

"Last week, you went on a three-day trip. You promised your teacher you would write a short article for the school magazine.

To help you write your article, you can use the following pictures. They show what you saw and did during the trip. Describe what happened in about 150 words. "

題目附有５張圖畫和有些提示字(prompts)。包括:putting up a tent, canoeing, mountain climbing/hiking, group games, campfire-singing/telling stories。

大部份學生的問題都是這些：

1. 只懂base on prompts,無elaboration, 無details. 可能因為無ideas,或者無生字(limited range of vocabulary).
2. 句子結構少變化 (simple language patterns).
3. 錯grammar,例如tense錯.
4.唔夠連貫(lack coherence),原因可能係缺乏transition words.

以下是兩個犯了以下毛病的samples(在TSA的網頁可找到):
1.

2.

那麼好的作品呢? 好的作品, 作者會加自己的elaboration. 我underline那些就是作者自己加的details. 他/她不單止加上圖畫以外的節目,例如eat breakfast, sleep,還有佢自己的感想(different feeling):

"When we arrived at the place where we would have our camping, we first put up a tent. Five of our group put up the tent. We spent a lot of time since we often failed to put it up. After some time, we finally put up the tent.

Then it was time for our to prepare our dinner. We put on fire and cooked some canned food. After dinner, we had group games. All of us felt very happy. Although I had played these games many times, I had a different feeling when playing in that atmosphere. It seemed happier than I had played before. After these games, many of us became friends. 

Since we did a lot of things in the afternoon, we had been very tired. We all fell asleep quickly.

After we had our breakfast with sausages and eggs, we had an exciting activity-canoeing. I had never been canoeing before. It seemed very interesting to me. This activity was full of excitement. I really enjoyed it. 

We had campfire after the delicious dinner. Some of us had a beautiful voice, so we invited them to sing for us. Their voice was just amazing. I was good at telling stories, so I told them a ghost story. All of them seemed to be quite afraid! Some people danced and some told jokes. This was just like a talent show. 

The next day was also the last day. We talked about our feeling during these days. I thought this trip was memorable and precious. "

剪報: 三成新高中生英文「肥佬」

圖：教育局昨日公布最新全港性系統評估報告顯示，中三生的中文和數學達標率與去年相若，但當中逾三成學生在英文科「肥佬」（資料圖片）　 【大公報訊】記者李盛芝報道：全港約二十萬名小三、小六及中三學生的全港性系統評估（TSA）昨日公布成績。逾三成本學年升讀新高中一年級、上學年評估時讀中三的學生在英文科「肥佬」。而達標率有六十八點八，較去年下跌百分之零點一。當中百分之八點二更屬小六時達標，但中三時卻「肥佬」。而中三生中文作文更抄襲電視、電影、廣告的故事，更加入「放飛機」、「好掂」、「O咀」等「潮語」。

全港性系統評估每年均會評估小三、小六及中三學生的中、英、數能力，但由於今年爆發甲型流感，教育局在六月宣布全港小學停課，故此小三及小六的學生只接受中、英文科說話評估及視聽資訊評估，而來自四百四十間中學、共七萬五千名中三學生則不受影響。

教育局昨日公布最新全港性系統評估報告顯示，中三生的中文和數學達標率與去年相若，但當中逾三成學生在英文科「肥佬」。考試及評核局追蹤○六年中三生於小六時的表現，發現當中百分之八點二學生於小六時達英語基本能力，升讀中三後英語不達標，按推算約五千二百名今年高一的學生，經過初中三年後英語退步。報告指出，這是反映學生英文能力隨學齡增長，表現優異的學生與成績不逮的學生差距日趨擴大。

構想力低 串字能力弱

但以中三學生的中、數兩科為例，今年達標率較三年前小六時為高，分別上升百分之零點九及百分之一點六。部分中三學生的中、英文寫作水平卻未見提高，中文科更有人抄襲電視、電影、廣告的故事，被批評「內容千篇一律，單薄乏味，連構想的動力也欠缺。」有學生在文章加入「潮語」，如「放飛機」、「好掂」、「O咀」，錯別字亦然，如把「純樸」錯寫成「淳樸」、「聞名」錯寫成「聞明」。英文報告均批評學生文法錯用之餘，串字能力極弱，如「tired」錯串成「tried」、「quiet」錯串成「quite」。

津貼中學議會主席廖亞全認為，全港學生都有急切需要學好英文，尤其今年就讀高一的學生，必須利用三年高中時間惡補英文，以應付二○一二年首屆香港中學文憑。「學界要正視學生的英語水平，不單高中生要加強訓練，初中亦不可忽視。」他建議中學校長可透過詞彙、文法、寫作的遊戲，增強學生對學習英語的興趣。

另外，教育局正考慮在明年的聆聽評估中，加入朗讀題目和選項的環節給非華語學生，以照顧他們語言不通的需要。當局亦會舉辦「促進學習的評估」研討會，以推動教師之間分享優良的教學實例。

這篇報道的重點是, 中三英文TSA在全港合格率在2008-2009那屆是68.8%. 即有約30%的中三學生未達標.